Do you ever feel like a total jerk?

So for those of you that don't know. Cam has been doing a Dental Externship in Minnesota with the Indian Health Service for 2 weeks. He will be back on Saturday which will be nice. It has taken a toll on all of us having him gone. Grant has said many times that he misses Cam and can't wait until he gets home. Claire has had a hard time understanding what is really going on. Today for the first time she said she misses dad, and tonight as I tucked them into bed she asked to have dad come in and give her a hug and a kiss when he got home. I felt so bad that I had to say he wouldn't be home until Saturday! Claire is pretty moody most of the time, but more so since Cam has been gone. While she was laying there in bed tonight she said "when we get up in the morning can we do something together?" I said -yes we are going to the park, I know that is not what she wanted to hear. She is the typical middle child who gets pushed around because she is the middle. Grant demands attention in his own way and Brig gets attention becuase he is the youngest and needs help. Claire it seems only gets my attention when I am mad at her or she is bugging Brig. She always wants to play but there is always something "to do" instead. I was watching American Idol tonight and David Cook sang a song about not wanting to close his eyes so the moment would last- or something like that. And that is when it hit me. I started to cry and felt like such a JERK!!! Poor Claire is always wanting my attention and I am never giving it to her in a postive way!! I turned the TV off and laid with her in her bed for a little bit while she slept. I am going to try to be a better mom and be more in tune to what she needs. She dosen't want to go to the park-she wants to be with ME! I am not the kind of mom to sit down and play with my kids, but I guess I need to learn! Thanks for reading my vent-it's nice to get it out!!!! P.S. if anyone comes to see me and you notice my house has gone to pot-it's just because I am trying to be a better mom-not the maid:)

Pics

I added a few more pics so you don't get so sick of the old ones.

Brig

Brig is such a pill!! He has some serious screaming issues!! Like I am being chopped up into tiny bites screaming-all the time. I am worried about the rest of the family's hearing! I say "stop it" or "no" but it does not really seem to phase him much. I started covering his mouth when he screams and saying "no". So guess what now he covers his mouth and screams!!!! HELP! He also has major anger management issues. He gets really mad really easily and will, hit, pull, bite, throw or just scream when he is mad. What is the deal? The real reason I am typing right now is becuase Cam is gone for 2 weeks and I was done with Claire tonight. I left the room and threatened her with a spanking if I went back in so I am typing instead of going back in. Thanks for reading my vent!

I am going to be a mechanic

We took our Mazda in to be fixed before Cam left to go to Minnesota for 2 weeks to do a Dental Externship with the Indian Health Service. It ends up because the car is SOOO old-a 1991. They had a hard time getting a part they needed. Cam had to leave Saturday and the car wasn't going to be done until Monday-today. So Cam took the van and I got the car. Mind you this is not just any 1991 car this thing can really rock and roll. I really like to drive it. I told Cam I am going to get a license place border that says looks like crap..drives like a porsche! It really is a great car. Anyway $600 later, we get it back. When I called to see if it was done the guy said, yea they are just having problems closing the hood, have you had problems in the past with the hood not closing? No it's always been fine. They got it closed and I picked it up. Cam had bought some new hubcaps-$13 at WALMART because we have been missing one for a LONG time so it only adds to the beauty of the car. I put the kids down for bed and went out and replaced the hubcaps-they look good. I also checked the oil to make sure I would make it for the next 2 weeks without Cam. It was fine so I tried to close the hood, again and again, it just wasn't closing! After making a lot of noise, I got our next door neighbor who is ALWAYS out working on his cars. He came and tried to close it a few times too and still the same thing. He went to grab some tools and I stood there looking and saw some sort of a cap just sitting on the rim of the car. I picked it up and when he came back I showed it to him. He said it was the old radiator cap that they didn't throw away. We look up and there was the evidence. Duh-a DENT in the underside of the hood from it trying to close on that cap! Hello!! How much of a discount do they give for dumb mechanics? I could do that job!!!